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Wednesday, December 19, 2018
So Sad Today: A Response
Melissa Broder: Bringing a child into the world without its consent seems unethical. Leaving the womb just seems insane. The womb is nirvana.
Me: I think the world has an overpopulation problem. There are also some horrible places and some ill-equipped parents. But it's not always unethical. Some babies might love the womb, while others might feel trapped.
Broder: Nobody asks to be born.
Me: Well, of course. But I think this is an argument to legalize suicide. Not complain about involuntary birth which is always involuntary. Take your eighteen years to check out the scene. Then if you want out - it's your body your choice. Or it should be.
Broder: I am a superficial woman of depth.
Me: I don't think that's unusual. I have plenty of interests that would qualify as superficial, but I still care about important issues.
Broder: Like any relationship, my relationship with god keeps evolving the longer I stay in it.
Me: I just don't know. I posted a mediocre poem on this topic, but I'm too lazy to look it up. I think the absentee landlord tag makes sense. I think people believe in a loving god because they want to believe in that. With or without a god, I don't see how something was created out of nothing. Neither the deists or the atheists have been able to explain this to my satisfaction.
Broder: The Internet means I get to be with people without leaving the house. Also, I can be anybody I want to be.
Me: I appreciate the convenience. But it is less personal. The quicker connections and mass connections have replaced the deeper connections. I don't feel like I can be anybody I want to be. At least not how I use the Internet. I might emphasize or downplay certain aspects of my personality depending on where I am online, but I'm always my same basic self.
Broder: Since I'm a white girl, the cops have never fucked with me.
Me: Well, which part matters here? The gender or the color? I'm a white man, and I've definitely been hassled by cops. So spare me the b.s. that cops are all angels until they see somebody who isn't white.
Broder: I feel bad about my struggle, because it is nothing compared to other people's struggles and yet it still hurts.
Me: We're dealt the hand we're dealt. She has it better than a lot of people, but she also has it worse than a lot of people. Other people having it worse doesn't mean she has a perfectly awesome, easy life. I feel like my life is worthless and I want it to be over, but that doesn't mean I'm not conscious of the fact that a lot of people have way more crap to make them unhappy. I think people can feel like they have problems or are struggling while still being aware of the larger picture.
Broder: Scared of what life is and if I am wasting mine.
Me: Well, she's a professional writer and a wife. So I don't think she's wasting her life. I think my life has been a waste. Or a failure or whatever. But our situations are wildly different.
Broder: All I want from you is to be liked.
Me: I think most people want to be liked. It takes different forms: followers on social media, number of real life friends, a lover or a spouse, a best friend, etc. But yeah - humans are usually social creatures to at least some extent.
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