Tuesday, October 24, 2017

An Elliptiical Contest: Round Ten



October is Halloween. It is also Country Music Month.

For each snippet of butchered country song lyrics, name the song, the horror movie, and the singer who made the song famous.  First and last names are required where applicable.

Three points for the winner.

Deadline: October 30

1.  I feel crazy
I feel crazy, yeah
No blonde bimbo's gonna stand in my way
Mom, I feel crazy today

I did some taxidermy then rented her a room
Watched her through the peephole before she met her doom
The moral of the story is simple but it's true
Sinning women lie, but mommies never do 

2.  Eighteen dreams and a dozen murders
Six more kids that he needs to kill
The same old hat on his ugly head
And he'll spend the rest of his life
In crappy sequels

3.  When whoever's in the sewer is through with you
And the clown finds better things to do
You know it's not too late 'cause you'll always have a reboot
When whoever's in the sewer is through with you

4.  Now I love the outdoors, and the other camps - ah they're ok
Crystal Lake is the place I want to be and I don't care if I ever go to North Star anyway
Cuz we got a serial killer and Monopoly and a guy in a wheelchair
We got an archery range and Mrs. Voorhees and girls in their underwear   

So screw you, we're from Crystal Lake

5.   Blame it on this hotel, I'm not feeling well
Something is wrong with my brain
The first one to crack, the first to attack
I was the first one to go quite insane

Cuz I see dead people in the halls
My son writes redrum on the walls
I love my wife, but I'll end her life
Hey, I don't like how this story goes
Think I'll take a walk out in the snow
Cuz I see dead people don't you know

6.  Any shark of mine better swim the line
Better show me a bitin', bleedin', feel-good summertime
I need a shark who knows how the movie goes
He's gotta be a real-lookin', scary-seemin'
Boat-wreckin' dangerous kind
Any shark of mine

7.  Mexico by sunrise
Down from Abilene
Every crime that we did
Were just crimes that criminals do

When the moon is high in that desert sky
We'll be drinking at a vampire bar
Mexico by sunrise
Mexico isn't far

8.  That's the scene in the garage with the killer
That's the scene where he murders Rose's character
Don't trust your role to a Hollywood writing team
The director of the film's a Neve fan, so it seems

9.  Checked into the old hotel
They say this room belongs in Hell
It hasn't changed since O'Malley's suicide
55 others have died

They broke the doorknob to keep me here
Made the other rooms disappear
It was getting weird
Even worse than I feared

That's a ghost and that's my wife
Why's this dream haunting my life?

10.  I am a doctor
At a clinic I'm employed
But I'm paranoid
I fall into the gap and there I die
Quentin could've saved me if he tried     

I'm an escape artist
My nickname is The Wren
I can't be locked up like other men
I enter a room I think is safe
But the acid seals my fate

I am an architect
I designed the outer shell
For what purpose my employer didn't tell
I see the light which means I can go free
But I have no more faith in humanity

I am a student
Mathematics is my skill
But one mistake might get us killed
At the end, I almost walk away
But I linger so forever I will stay 

Note:  One of the songs is more of a country - blues hybrid than pure country.

Ryman Auditorium - Nashville


 



 

4 comments:

  1. I am lame with the song and Singer but the first one is Psycho. The 2nd one is Nightmare on Elm St. #3 is It #4 I think that one is Jason..Friday the 13th. #5 The Shining. #6 Jaws #7 From Dusk Til Dawn. #8. Scream #9. No clue and no clue for #10.

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  2. goddammit, e. this one's HARD. i can't play. which means ericka's probably going to win. you SUCK.

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    Replies
    1. You're a movie buff living in Texas. This should have been yours easily.

      Two more rounds though.

      Delete
    2. i don't do horror, dude. you should know that.

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